wat a day...

wat a day today.. i think i might have woken up on the wrong side of the bed.. my day seem so lost and less exciting today.. i didnt have the mood to do my work neither did i have the mood to mix ard today.. i didnt have lunch with my colleagues as usual.. didnt feel like eating.. basically today i was not being myself.. totally not the Nadiah i was.. wat i wanted so much was a hug and a shoulder to lean on... i wanted that so badly.. u noe.. i was so close to giving up on my work and i was suppose to submit by today.. haiz.. totally disappointed im myself... totally so..

i kept telling myself i can do it and not to give up but i guess that feeling got over me today.. i certainly hope i would have a better day tmr.. i certainly do.. i wont feel relieved until i submit my file.. omg... i made sure no one saw me cry..

my colleagues asked...

Nadiah are u ok?

i am fine.. why?

u dun seemed like urself today..

haha... so u see my day was pretty sucky and low.. during lunch hr, i talked to saad.. i called her.. not sure wat made me call her but i just felt like calling her.. before that, i was chatting with her online and told her that my fren faizah went for an interview at far east org.. i was happy to hear that but it suddenly made me think how jealous and upset of it.. haha... moment of truth, when lyd got the job at far east org.. i was so so jealous of her.. y? cos she got the job dere... and on top of that, linda is gonna work dere too.. u must be thinking how great is linda? just that i was closer to her than the rest was i guess.. and i tot maybe working together would be great.. haiz.. how pathetic am i.. den again, when i tot abt it, its unfair of me to feel that way, lyd's my fren and the least that i could do was to be happy for her... ryte? i tried so hard not to show a "plastic" smile.. i failed.. haha.. i tink she knew it too..

oh well, as i was saying.. i told saad that our grp of frens weren't as close as before and she said it probably started when lyd just shut us off except for linda during her transitional period... i said "yah maybe".. it was the time that got me angry and "betrayed".. haiz.. i told myself.. to hell with watever is happening.. i will just listen.. like im known for.. a good listener.. hehe.. listen and listen.. the frens whom i tot wont lose contact, slowly is.. so hu are the frens whom i can depend on? truly...

ok then, i will just end it here for today.. pls do take care alrite..

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